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Resilience in the Face of Adversity

4/30/2017

 
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April 30, 2017
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #36
From the Greenbelt of Boise, Idaho, Crisp Spring breeze

 

We tend to exaggerate the impact of future events on our happiness and how lasting that impact will be … We’re very resilient creatures who recover as quick as we can from the pitfalls of life.
– Tim Wilson
 
 

It was 6:30 in the morning on a crisp spring morning, and I was standing in the open space surrounded by four grapefruit trees. I was dripping wet, chilled and had just broken through a spider-web with my face as I pushed between two trees. Yuck!

Standing in the middle of the orchard, I needed a moment to regroup and figure out how I was going to keep going. 12 years old, I was determined to meet my grandfather at the bottom of the orchard. We were moving sprinklers, an early morning routine. He was going down one pipeline, and I was going down the other, each with a set of sprinkler hoses to move. Whoever got to the bottom first, would start up on the other pipeline until we met. The trees had grown so close together, there was no other way than to push through the dewy, spider-web laden branches.

What could I do in the middle of the orchard? At the time, I didn’t know much about social psychology or resilience. What I remember is being a little fearful of spiders crawling on me, and not liking being wet and cold. The only way out was to walk through more tree branches. Fortunately, I didn’t get caught in worry about each set of branches I needed to pass through.  After catching my breath, I continued on, meeting my grandfather and going back to the house for a warm breakfast before the rest of the work day.

How do we persevere with resilience in the face of adversity?

As Timothy Wilson, social psychologist relates, “we tend to exaggerate the impact of future events on our happiness and how lasting that impact will be.” As a 12-year-old, my determination to do what my grandfather could quickly propelled me past my momentary fears and discomfort.

Now in my fifties, I realize resilience isn’t so easy. Life has a way of presenting adversity when we don’t expect it. What actions can we take? Here are a few:
  • Developing our commitment to achieve what we care about helps.
  • Recalling past experiences where we surmounted obstacles gives us resources and confidence to call upon.
  • Acknowledging our fears and figuring out our options for action in the present moment make a difference.
  • Rewriting the story in our mental narrative enables new action.
  • Developing a learning community with peers builds insight and accountability.

Today I build upon my experiences in farming, leading change initiatives at Hewlett Packard, evidence-based practices in coaching and organizational development, and the training and practice of Aikido.

I partner with executives and professionals to confidently lead in the face of uncertainty and complexity. Together we build trust, and cultivate leadership and organizational effectiveness to create a better future today. To learn more visit here.

Let’s create a better future today!

Commit to Being a Leader

4/23/2017

 
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April 23, 2017
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #35
From the Greenbelt of Boise, Idaho, Calm before thunder showers 



Individual commitment to a group effort – that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work.
– Vince Lombardi
 
Leadership can be divided into two categories: leadership as a role and leadership as a way of being.
– Richard Strozzi-Heckler
 
 

Commitment is a cornerstone for creating a better future for ourselves and those around us. When our commitment wavers, we freeze or pull back from following through. Without a clear commitment, we lack impetus to act and devolve into reacting to whatever comes our way. There are a lot of events happening in the world today to consume our lives in reaction.
 
Creating clear commitments for ourselves enables us to cut through the cacophony of things that distract our attention. Living with clear commitments focuses our attention to achieve what we care about. I find it very useful to regularly ask myself these questions:
  • What do I care most about?
  • What are my intentions for effective action?
  • What are my commitments to myself and those I care about?
 
By clarifying what I care most about, I’m able to prioritize where to focus my attention and energy. By being clear about my intentions, I create resolve in how I want to act. By stating my commitments, I dedicate myself to following through in the face of adversity.
 
I care about creating a better future today in our families, organizations and communities. My intention is to act skillfully with pragmatic wisdom and compassion. My commitment is to cultivate clear confident leaders who energize themselves and those around them to make a difference in their lives and work.
 
We often think of leadership as something that is done by someone with a title: President, CEO, etc. We judge leaders by what we observe them to be doing and how it impacts us. There are hundreds of thousands of articles, books and programs stating what leaders need to do. And as some authors have stated, the past 40 years of the leadership industry in America has not done very well, as we continue to see declines in our view of leadership in corporations, government and media.
 
My sense is that our view of our “leaders” is a reflection of our view of leadership. To the extent that we view leadership as something done by others with a titular responsibility for the group, then so do our leaders, as they are not so different from us. To really shift leadership, we need to make our individual commitment to being leaders ourselves. By committing to leadership as a way of being, we hold ourselves and others accountable to rise to a higher level.
 
I encourage each of us to ask and answer the following questions:
  • What do I care most about?
  • What are my intentions for effective action?
  • What are my commitments to myself and those I care about?
  • What helps me be a leader with those with whom I live and work?
 
I partner with executives and professionals to confidently lead in the face of uncertainty and complexity. Together we build trust, and cultivate leadership and organizational effectiveness to create a better future today. To learn more visit here.

Let’s create a better future today!

Celebrate Life in the Present

4/17/2017

 
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April 17, 2017
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #34
From the Greenbelt of Boise, Idaho, Flowering pear blossoms falling



The most beautiful things are not associated with money; they are memories and moments. If you don’t celebrate those, they can pass you by.
– Alek Wek
 
Celebrate what you want to see more of.
​– Tom Peters
 
 
I participate in a Mastermind Group that meets monthly. We focus on developing our professional skills as coaches, business and career development, transitions, and in navigating the challenges we each bump into in the course of our lives.
 
It is a wonderful community of practice and learning. We coach each other, provide support and encouragement and serve as accountability partners for each other in pursuit of our individual commitments.
 
This month we considered three questions:
  1. How do I practice living my commitment the best I can each day vs. having it be something I’m working toward in the future?
  2. Where is my energy focused – on the future or today?
  3. How do I leave each day enriched from the practice of my commitment?
 
Thinking through my responses to these questions awakened me to how much of my time I spend on doing things for something better in the future. I frequently over-focus on the future to the neglect of celebrating what is in the present, today.
 
This past weekend it was a pleasure to slow down and celebrate a gorgeous spring weekend, one of my son’s birthdays with family, and Easter.
 
It was a good reminder to focus on what I can do today, and celebrate the practice of what I care about with the people with whom I live and work.
 
How do you leave each day enriched from the practice of what you care about?
 
Let’s create a better future today!

Leadership Conversations and Executive Control of Attention

4/9/2017

 
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April 9, 2017
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #33
From the Greenbelt of Boise, Idaho, Spring Frost and Bright Sun
 
Smart leaders today, we have found, engage with employees in a way that resembles an ordinary person-to-person conversation more than it does a series of commands from on high.
– Boris Groysberg and Michael Slind
 
How much information can our conscious mind hold in its working memory? About four “chunks,” and it can hold them only for thirty seconds or less.
– Andrew Newberg and Mark Waldman
 

Today’s rapidly evolving, and frequently uncertain and complex environment requires us to shift how we lead. Whether it’s in our personal lives or in our professional roles, we benefit and thrive when we move from a command and control approach to one of co-creation through conversation.
 
Our challenge is in developing our Executive Control of Attention to stay present in the current moment and actively listen as we engage in conversations with other people.
 
During conversations, it takes energy to stay focused and thus it is not long before our Attention brain networks tire and we stop listening. As Andrew Newberg and Mark Waldman describe, that can be less than thirty seconds.
 
Our Default Mode Network takes over and we retreat from the outside world into our own story or narrative. When this happens, I find I’m tuning people out, and often based on my own interpretations generating what I think should be done.
 
The problem occurs when my reverie is interrupted, usually by the other person pausing aware I’m no longer fully there. Alerted by the pause, I re-awaken to the present moment. As I orient myself, either I tell them what I was thinking or use a noncommittal response. I’ve just dis-engaged from effective conversation by not recognizing and acknowledging what they just shared.
 
Our opportunity is to focus our attention on active listening first before responding. I find the following questions helpful in developing my active listening:
  • What information has just been shared?
  • What feelings/emotions have been conveyed?
  • What needs are being articulated?
  • What intentions are being communicated?
  • How do I acknowledge those first?
 
Developing Executive Control of Attention to actively listen takes practice. Fortunately, there are many conversational opportunities each day in which I can experiment and learn.
 
How do you develop your Executive Control of Attention to be present and actively listen?
 
What supports you in shifting to leadership through conversations?
 
I partner with executives and professionals to confidently lead in the face of uncertainty and complexity through co-creative conversations. Together we build trust, and cultivate leadership and organizational effectiveness to create a better future today. To learn more visit here.

Let’s create a better future today!

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    A Clear Confident Leader engages, inspires, and assists people to develop themselves, enabling them to create new possibilities and a better future today.

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