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What if I couldn't fail, only learn and grow?

2/10/2018

 
Picture
February 10, 2018
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #64
From the Greenbelt of Boise Idaho, Frosty Blue Sky morning
 

 
 
You must change your state of being. You cannot change radically within the same state.
– Peter Ralston
 
What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?
– Kimbal Anderson
 


 
I was co-facilitating a program this week, preparing an experienced group of trainer/facilitators to deliver a new coaching program within their organization. As we started I asked, how do you feel about this?
 
    “I’m not ready.”     “I’m anxious and concerned.”     “I’m a little fearful, we didn’t have time to prepare.”
 
What if you knew you couldn’t fail, only learn and grow?
 
    “I’d be more confident.”     “I’d relax and enjoy learning.”     “I’d have fun.”
 
It’s pretty amazing how changing our state of being from “fear of failure” to “the joy of learning and growth” can transform us. The words we choose have deep emotional impacts. Consider the self-judgement that arises when you think of your life in the context of success and failure, good and bad.
 
The judgements create either-or thinking and foster a fixed mindset based on fear and doubt, leading us to hold back, and limit what we’ll consider.   
 
By letting go of the "fear of failure" we open ourselves to discover what works and what doesn’t, improve our skills and develop ourselves; we adopt a growth mindset. As Peter Ralston describes, “The skill level we developed while growing up is not the end of what’s possible. It is simply where we stopped.”  We can restart and continue to learn and grow throughout our lives.

 
This change of being has a huge impact on organizations. The research by Carol Dweck and others is pretty clear, employees in Growth Mindset Workplaces are:
  • One-third more likely to feel a strong sense of ownership and commitment to the organization.
  • About half more likely to say their colleagues are trustworthy and their organization fosters innovation.
  • About two-thirds more likely to say the organization supports risk taking.
 
I work with teams and leaders to create better results through the conscious practice of leadership using a Growth Mindset. Let’s create a better future today!

Tunnel Vision - What's at Risk?

2/3/2018

 
Picture
February 3, 2018
Clear Confident Leader Weekly Observer, Issue #63
From the Greenbelt of Boise Idaho, Dark skies
 


We have nothing to fear but fear itself. – Franklin D. Roosevelt
 
In any situation that you encounter, you can either respond to what is occurring, or you can respond to your ideas and emotions about what is occurring. – Peter Ralston
 
 
 
​
I was driving to a meeting thinking about a difficult situation, and my mind kept returning to one outcome: deliver a clear message about what needed to be satisfied, or else. This thought had been coming up for the past few days as the meeting approached, and it was intensifying as I moved closer to the meeting place.
 
I paused realizing my body was contracting and the resulting tension was leading me to “lock-on” to a specific outcome, and “lock-out” contextual understanding and other possibilities. I was so focused on getting through what I felt and thought to be conflict, my perception shrank to very narrow tunnel vision. I was stuck responding to my reactions instead of what was really occurring.
 
Stepping back, I reflected on what fears had been triggered that led to my body to react. I realized I’d fallen back into my long-lived habit of tensing to protect and driving to control to make it through difficult situations. The more I ran the story in my mind, the more I was responding to my ideas and fears about what was occurring.
 
What was really at risk here? Yes, a clear boundary needed to be communicated. And, what was at risk was an important relationship. If I shut down and focused on control, I was likely to create the risk I was most concerned about.
 
We develop reactive habits as we grow up, enabling us to cope with life’s situations as best we can at the time. These reactive habits have gifts and strengths within them that we can creatively utilize, when the habits are not in control of us. Learning to see our habits as they arise, enables us to accept their wisdom and let go of their control, and choose to respond to what is occurring.
 
I work with teams and leaders to create better results through the conscious practice of leadership. Let’s create a better future today!


    A Clear Confident Leader engages, inspires, and assists people to develop themselves, enabling them to create new possibilities and a better future today.

    ​The Observer focuses on practical steps to generate clarity, confidence, and leadership in ourselves and those around us. 

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